Graduate limbo

Something I am struggling with at the moment is the pure frustration of finding myself in a self-imposed middle ground, I'm neither here nor there at the moment and in all honesty it is testing me. Don't get me wrong, it is a privilege to be in this position because for once I have everything together! I am 100% sure that many thousands of students have been in this exact situation long before little old me came along but as always, I feel the need to talk about it to anyone who will listen, so sit tight......

I have recently graduated from my English Literature degree at Sheffield Hallam University. I am immensely proud of this achievement and I am equally proud of every single one of my course mates. Long before my final year I had been contemplating what to do after my degree (Well to be honest it was soon after I enrolled) I had contemplated the idea of moving to London and getting in to publishing, teaching English abroad, teaching English in the UK or finding my way in to the PR industry immediately. This kind of uncertainty is pretty normal for me but 2 things in particular changed my outlook on my future:

1. Getting hands on experience in a unique industry thanks to a University Project - SHU Racing
2. A short but sweet chat with a great friend while working at Clearing 2014.

A mix of these 2 situations made me realise what I wanted to do with my life and how I should start on the path to that industry. Through the PR experience I have gained with my amazing SHU Racing team over the past 3 years I decided to apply for my MA in Public Relations and I am ecstatic to say that I have been accepted! September cannot come quickly enough!

BUT that is only half of the story! My frustration comes from job interview after job interview that ends the same way - being brought to a halt like a boy-racer at a red light - As soon as I mention my academic plans for the coming year regardless of the job being full time or part time. Game over! Don't get me wrong, I understand that businesses are reluctant to spend valuable time and money on a new recruit who come September will have to reduce their working hours significantly but it is the business who will surely reap the benefits by having a qualified employee on their books, isn't it?

Either way, it is pretty soul destroying after a while but I can promise any other graduates in their academic middle ground - The thick skin you develop over this time will come in handy, trust me. Mine has come in use over the last few months and has made me a stronger woman!

Is it just me?

Well, that went quickly!
About to say something I have wanted to say for many years.... I finished university on Friday! IT has long been a dream of mine to study English Literature and I've just done it! No more Essays, No more exams, No more deadlines (until September!) and oh my god it feels good to relax... but it doesn't really. In fact it feels pretty dull! I don't know if any other final year students feel the same way or have experienced this but I feel a bit empty at the minute, like i'm in limbo, no one told me this would be my overall emotion after 3 years of hard work, reading lists and all nighters. I was expecting a feeling of elation once that final essay hit the submission desk but instead I sit here wondering what to do for the next few months until my Masters degree begins.

Yes I can hear you all screaming "GET A JOB!!" at the screen and yes I do intend on doing so but I guess what i'm trying to say is that I don't feel how I expected to feel after ticking something off my bucket list. There are no self high 5's and not a flicker of a burning sense of pride. Is there something wrong with me??

Is it just me who feels like this right now??

Rik Mayall - Rest in Peace

This is a post I really never thought I'd have to write, so i'm gonna try and hold it together.

Later today one of my comedy heroes is being laid to rest and to be completely honest I'm still as dazed as I was the minute I heard about it last week. Rik Mayall has always been a huge factor in my life but like thousands of the other grieving fans around the world I have been stunned by how strong this sense of grief really is. I never had the honour of meeting the man himself but yet i feel like i've lost a friend or a member of my own family.

I have spent many minutes in the past week watching episodes of The Young Ones and Bottom reliving the memory of this fabulous human being. Episodes that i haven't seen for many years. See, i grew up watching Rik and his alternative comedy. Most of the time this was done in secret, having to sneak around and having the TV unbelievable quietly so my parents didn't know i was watching something so inappropriate for a little girl of  5 years old. This man soon became my little secret. So as I write this with an hour until his funeral, as a 24yr old woman I feel like that secret part of my childhood has been taken away from me.

I Couldn't put in to words what Rik meant or represented to me until i watched of of his movies at the weekend. The brilliant Drop Dead Fred tells the story of a girl who's world falls apart after losing her job, husband and car all in one lunchtime, she moves back home and is soon visited by her childhood imaginary friend (Played by Mayall) Madness soon ensues as she goes about getting her husband back with the help of Fred. We soon find out that in his own way Fred is helping her get her life back on track and give her strength to carry on and realise her worth.We see flash backs of her causing chaos with Fred as a child. These flashbacks resonated with me and reminded me of sneaking around just so i could watch him in the latest episode of bottom.As a well behaved young girl, this i guess was my small act of rebelion in a world of innocnece, an innocence that is lost as you grow up. To me I guess Rik represents freedom, he truly embodies Fred as everyone's imaginary friend and i will always hold on to that.

So as the time comes to lay the great man to rest, we can only imagine what the future could've held for him but i'm going to treasure the laughs and the giggle he gave me. He will always be my little secret.

I hate goodbyes, they seem too final
 
"Just Kiss Me and say Drop Dead Fred" 
       

It has been too long!

Hi all.

Sorry i have neglected this page a bit recently. I have been swamped with uni work and meetings none stop since September. Looking forward to a good old chilled out family christmas. Just one more week to go until i finish uni and i can get in to full on christmas mode!!

Stay tuned for a hell of a lot of random blogging as i catch up with EVERYTHING!!! 

Date or no date?

I have just stumbled upon this draft of a blog i meant to submit a few weeks ago, after reading through it i am still none the wiser about dating as a whole.

Thursday night at 9 and I'm watching First Dates on Channel 4.
I have been fascinated by this show since it started. About how people deal with first date nerves, small talk and awkward silences (of which there seem to be many)
The idea behind the show is that the initial 'couples' applied on line and from then on, throughout the week, members of the public can apply via the website to go on a date with a particular person on the show and so on and so forth as the weeks go on. A subtle reality dating show perhaps? This also translates as an interesting social experiment into showing the dating habits and personality traits that we find attractive or not. Although i am currently puzzled by the couple right now who are taking it in turns to say the guy's name - Hank. Hmmmm, Struggling for conversation??
In full honesty it is a clear way of highlighting that some people just aren't compatible but too many relationships are lived out over the cybersphere, in a world of emoticons and lol's. When it comes to a traditional 'date' have we completely forgotten how to act?? Or do we even go on traditional first dates anymore??

http://cdn.sheknows.com/articles/2011/07/woman-on-bad-date.jpg

 Speaking from experience, i have been on one 'official' first date. All i will say is that first impressions mean everything and this person's red velvet attire didn't impress me in the slightest! It still makes me cringe to this day!
I had been chatting to the person by text for a few days and seemed to get on OK but then the red suit put me off. Is it shallow of me to base the rest of the evening's enjoyment on that one first look i had of him in that hideous suit??

 On the show, all the women came up dressed to the nines while the men looked much more casual and to be honest in most cases, the women seemed to flow through the conversations whist the men stumbled and stutter.  
Do we put too much pressure on ourselves when getting ready for a date over what we wear, what we need to say, how we put ourselves across because we no longer have a computer screen to hide behind?? or a couple of minutes to think of a witty/flirtatious reply to a text/e-mail

Perhaps i should set myself a little social experiment of my own and go out on a 'first date'

Summer days at Silverstone

Summer days at Silverstone are a new favourite of mine after 2 days at the home of British Motorsport watching the Young Drivers test days with some of my favourite people! Here are some of our snap shots:

A Primark Bowie Bargain!

Hi all

One thing i love about summer is that my mum is off work for 6 weeks. We are in the middle of having a few girly days out doing what i do best..... Shopping. I just had to tell you all about my bargain of the day/century!

Had a quick mooch around Primark and stumbled upon a t-shirt that I have had my eye on for a month or 2.

As you have probably seen from my previous posts, i am a tiny bit of a David Bowie fan. I do love a bit of the starman. So what better way to show it off than on a t-shirt. This was originally £8 so i trundled off to the till and was given a fabulous surprise when it went through as £1... Now that is what i call a Bowie Bargain!